Here Are the Options

I am going to start this post with a sentence that you will either have no interest in or feel uncomfortable with. BUT DO NOT FEAR, DO NOT STOP READING, it gets… uh… good, I promise.

So I’ve had this rash for a while now, and while I refer to it as a rash, it was more like several rashes, none of them in awkward places. They covered my back, hands, shoulders, and neck, and they were getting pretty darn painful so I went to the doctor, was given a diagnosis (2 different skin conditions, good old psoriasis and something a little more exotic), was given something to treat both of them. That was on Tuesday.

There is a particular portion of this affliction, located on my neck, that over the course of the past few days became red and permanently painful, and has now evolved into something that is mildly green, mostly brown, and kind of crunchy looking. If you are wincing, you are correct, CONSTANT PAIN. I also appear to be growing a set of what could be scales on my shoulder.

There are three options for why this is happening according to my writer brain, and here they are;

1) I am being mummified by some kind of Supernatural Force.

I have no idea what the purpose could be, the idea seems sound at first, but there is no reason for it, what is the objective of the Supernatural Force in beginning to mummify me while I am still alive?

2) I was bitten by a radioactive lizard/reacted badly to something that was supposed to cure mankind. In which case I hope I get super powers, but preferably something that means that I can masquerade as a normal, scale free human when I want to. Although the way things are looking I fit several of the criteria for becoming a nemesis of Spiderman. Not that I’m a scientist…

Still rooting for super powers because I just want super powers okay.

3) I have been a slave to a ring of power for this entire time and the changes to my skin are just the beginning of my becoming like Gollum. [//gollum gollum] Which cannot end well, obvs.

Feel free to share your thoughts on my impending mummification/super powerdom/doom and in the meantime I will wear a lot of scarves so that people think that I am a Normal Person with Normal Skin.

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